schmerica: (gerard's always been my older brother)
Hello! I was productive today and wrote the porn I've been babbling about to [livejournal.com profile] shoemaster and [livejournal.com profile] impertinence and [livejournal.com profile] lordessrenegade! Here it is, if you would like to read it. I have been trying and failing at describing it to people, but let's go with dead!Mikey!spirit-in-Pete's-head jerk-off porn. Okay?

This starts out like commenty/chatfic (because I am quoting from an actual email I sent Jai) but then it becomes much more storylike for the actual porn. I will probably not write more in this universe, because the stuff that would make up the actual *story* part of it doesn't interest me as much to write? So, due warning and all that.

Blah blah blah death warning blah blah blah it's porn blah blah blah IDK, do you people have telepathy squicks?

Anyway. THAT SAID, here we go:

I have been thinking about the story where Mikeyway dies and then is, like, a spirit, right? And the person he finds who can hear him and understand him is Pete who unbeknownst to himself is apparently a natural medium. And Mikey has to use Pete to go and find Gerard again!

It goes on from there )
schmerica: (DAMMIT ryan ross)
Last night Kelly and I were talking about 4/20 and band boys because they are all lol stoners and one of us made a joke about how hilarious it would be if one of them really wasn't a stoner.

And that made us both think of Joan of Arcadia and I realized OMG IMAGINE JON WALKER AS ADAM ROVE.

*___________________*

It works so well it's not even funny. And also explains a lot about [livejournal.com profile] happy_coconut's taste in boys, because lol has a type.

You guys you guys you guys. That would make Ryan Ross of Arcadia! HE'S AN INSTRUMENT OF GOD. How adorable is that?

That might make Spencer Grace Polk and Brendon loser-y little brother Luke. We're not sure about that part.
schmerica: (teen sensations)
I think what I enjoy most about the Northern Downpour video is the fact that for most of the video, Brendon looks like he is posing as the strapping young country lad about to have a passionate affair tumbling down-and-out nobleman's daughters in the stable stalls of a romance novel.

Also, I don't know if you guys know this or not, but Ryan Ross? Kind of a stupid face. Oh god.

In other news, speaking of romance novels, I have a desire in my soul for Cash/Singer romance novel AU of questionable historical accuracy. With balls and regency cliches and relationships of convenience. Yep yep. Also my icon reminds me that all historical AUs should include Miley Cyrus cameos, just because I love her.

I am at that place in my sickness where I can see the shining goal of NOT BEING SICK somewhere in the distance ahead, but it does not seem to get any closer. Just out of my reach! Siiiiiiiiigh.
schmerica: (i get it)
So I just read this YA book that took place at Los Alamos during WWII, when all the scientists were holed up there working really really hard and it was all super top secret classified and nobody knew the place even existed at all. The book was about these two young girls growing up there while their parents worked on the bomb, but unfortunately the book (The Green Glass Sea by Ellen Klages) was not actually that good -- it was sort of generic-historical-younger-readers, you know? But now I kind of want a Manhatten Project bandom AU. All obsessive and smart and working incredibly hard under so much pressure and nobody else in the world knows what's going on! That's fascinating.

So, uh. Get on that, fandom! :D?
schmerica: (teen sensations)
Lea and I have decided we want an AU where Bert and Brendon and Pete and maybe Frank and any other of our tiny boys with freakish bendiness and/or upper body strength should be men's gymnasts. Imagine how hard Pete would push himself, dude, he'd be ridiculous. I am not sure how the Way brothers fit into this, but in order to make both me and Lea happy, Mikey would have to be Pete's ex he's still friends with while Patrick is totally his boyfriend going about his own perfectly normal life except for the whatthefuckdatingacrazycompetitiveathlete.

I know some of you out there have the ability to manip this for us. You're not fooling anybody.

pearl: also greta could be an olympic fencer.
pearl: because that's hot.
lea: ........oh wow
lea: omg, and gabe can be her creepy fan who has a glittery sign with hearts that says STAB THEM
pearl: ahahahahah.
pearl: they are totally dating, but they both prefer the term "stalker" to "boyfriend"

(Also the Cab would be faily. As they are in everything.)
schmerica: (is anybody out there)
So I told [livejournal.com profile] loveyouallwrong about how I wanted Pete/Mikey selkie fic, and she freaked out and called me a furry. If you ever wondered where Lea's line are: there you go. Pete/Hemmy mpreg where Hemmy has magically turned into a human? Okay. Selkie fic? SQUICK.

The more you know, right?

Uh, for those of you who don't share Lea's aversion, here's 750 words of commentfic on the subject, because I am dumb and wrote it out to describe to someone and thus lost all need to actually make myself write it. Lame, self. Very lame.

SELKIES ARE AWESOME SHUT UP )
schmerica: (touche)
So another thing about this week's Doctor Who is that it has reminded me how I totally want an old-fashioned type murder mystery AU for bandom. Oh, it could be so glorious!

Scene:
House party at Lady Ashlee's

Characters:
Gerard Way ... He portrays the distracted artist to a tee, but assuming naivete would be a mistake
Mikey Way ... Once a notorious partier, drinker, gambler and general man about town, his recent marriage seems to have changed his ways
Alicia Way ... Still occupied with the domestic joys of being a newlywed, Mrs Way seems quite accustomed to getting her own way
Pete Wentz ... A popular writer and Lady Ashlee's ersatz flame, no one's entirely sure where the rumors stop and the truth begins
Patrick Stump ... Wentz's collaborater, he's the steady, responsible one, but there's quite a ferocious temper hidden behind that friendly face
Gabe Saporta ... He's devoted his life to his dedication to pleasure -- few people see the spark of the true religious believer in his eyes
Greta Salpeter ... Young and blonde and pretty; surely she's nothing but sweet and wholesome...
Ryan Ross ... Wentz's protege, his monotonous scowl has transformed into a beaming smile over the last few months. Surely no one is that absent-minded naturally?
Spencer Smith ... Ross's best friend and de facto caretaker, he has an organized mind and a ferocious protective streak
Brendon Urie ... a rising singing star, the meteoric rise of his career is countered by the debacle of his personal life
Bert McCracken ... Following a tumultuous break-up with G. Way, McCracken's bad public reputation overshadows his true personality. Why did he accept this invitation?
Travis McCoy ... the world-famous detective, this is his first case since becoming clean and sober

AND THEN THERE'S A POWER OUTAGE AND A ~~~~~MURDER AND IT'S VERY EXCITING AND SHOCKING. THEY ARE CUT OFF FROM THE OUTSIDE WORLD BY THE STORM AND TRAVIE MUST FIND THE MURDERER .... BEFORE S/HE STRIKES AGAIN!!!!

AND THERE ARE HIJINX! AND DETECTING! AND IT'S TOTALLY AWESOME, OKAY?

Uhhhh, feel free to expand on this scenario if the mood strikes you. Surely some of you must be as dorky for this genre as I am.
schmerica: (bitchy catholic schoolgirl gerard!)
You know, in the AU where both Gerard and Mikey have always been girls, I cannot fully conceive of just how much detail Mikey must have gotten all the time about Bert McCracken's love of cunnilingus.
schmerica: (world's best boyfriend)
So in the comments to my last entry, [livejournal.com profile] impertinence and I started discussing the concept of what a Gerard/Ray historical AU would look like if it was actually a Regency romance novel and also Gerard was a chick.

It might not surprise you to learn we had a lot of thoughts on this topic. Long comment threads are kind of a huge pain, so I pasted it all together and cleaned it up a tiny bit so it's slightly easier to read. Um, it's not a story. It is a ridiculous, handwavey outline of melodramatic schmoop.

&our brains;

GERARD/RAY ARRANGED MARRIAGE OMG )
schmerica: (bitchy catholic schoolgirl gerard!)
Here, livejournal, I want to share some thoughts with you that I was talking about with people earlier:

I just thought about Bert/Gerard getting pregnant pre-break-up and it made me wanna cry.

They would be all cuddly and excited when Gee first gets knocked up! And while everyone else in the world is like "oh, this is not good" they're like "STFU! Baby! Yay!"

And then they break up before the baby is even born and Gee doesn't even want to let Bert see it -- it's Gee's baby, not his, Bert doesn't have anything to do with it except forgetting a condom.

It's so saaaaaaaaad. Because on the one hand, he is the dad and Gee is kind of a bitch to keep his kid away from him, but on the other hand, Bert's still drinking a lot/doing drugs/saying bad things about Gee in public so it's not like he's making a good argument for why she's wrong.

IDK [if Gee would eventually let the kid see Bert]! I can't really figure out what it would take to change Gee's mind, and meanwhile they would probably keep resenting each other more, right? Gee is overprotective. The kid has her! And her band! It doesn't need bad influences.

(Also I am not sure why this became girl!Gerard instead of mpreg, but whatever.)


So, wow, there is no way I would ever write this story both because a) I don't know what would happen next and b) it would make me too sad (and, ugh, the stuff about Bert's ex-girlfriend overdosing while she was pregnant with his kid makes it even worse), but jeez. I can't stop thinking about it. My poor darlings! I don't even know when I became a tragic Bert/Gerard shipper, but I totally did.

I guess at least in the future when I think about them, I'll be able to go "yes, it is sad, but at least they didn't bring a BABY into it!" So there's an upside! Um.
schmerica: (mikeyway: lesbian)
[livejournal.com profile] pearl_o: I need to write more high school pete/mikey today.
[livejournal.com profile] bexless: *_______________*
[livejournal.com profile] pearl_o: I am thinking about mikeyway doing his hair really carefully in hte mirror for an hour before making gerard take him to one of pete's soccer games.
[livejournal.com profile] pearl_o: it is really hot and crowded and gross. mikey doesn't actually ever have any idea what is going on.
[livejournal.com profile] pearl_o: like, he gets that the point is to try and kick the ball into the goal, but everybody's moving really fast and he doesn't really understand it.
[livejournal.com profile] pearl_o: also, he's not sure which one is pete, anyway.
[livejournal.com profile] pearl_o: one of the ones in red.
[livejournal.com profile] bexless: OH MIKEY
[livejournal.com profile] pearl_o: also, gerard is whining the whole time.
[livejournal.com profile] pearl_o: but after the game, when pete sees him, he does that really stupid, really wide horsey grin and says MIKEYWAY!
[livejournal.com profile] pearl_o: because he's so surprised mikey came.
[livejournal.com profile] pearl_o: so it was a really fucking boring couple of hours, but the part afterward is really nice.
[livejournal.com profile] bexless: PETERRRRRRRRRRRRRRR
[livejournal.com profile] bexless: UGH UGH UGH <33333333333333333
[livejournal.com profile] pearl_o: ♥ BOYS.
[livejournal.com profile] pearl_o: now i am not actually going to write that part into a ficlet, though. oops! maybe i will post the chat to my journal and then just write about them making out later on.

I told [livejournal.com profile] sociofemme I would write her more Pete/Mikey high school AU. This is pretty sappy, but I'm okay with that. <3

Same universe as Deep in the Belly of a Whale. About 1000 words.

you're so lucky i'm around )
schmerica: (ollie is a man of tact)
I feel like I should be ashamed about liking the anon memes, but what the fuck ever. They're entertaining, in an empty calorie way! Like drinking too much Coke.

That is not the main point of this entry, though. The main point of this entry is to tell you all that I think this fandom could benefit from a Russian Revolution AU. Actually, I think that is true of every fandom ever, but since bandom is the only fandom I'm actually reading right now, it is the one I am concentrating on. Frank and Bob in the Red Army together! Mikey and Pete's true love against the backdrop of international politics ~wrenching them apart~! Ray and Gerard redoing Doctor Zhivago! It's beautiful.

...This is the part of the entry where I was going to link to the awesome scan of Soviet Batman from the Red Son miniseries, but it turns out I don't actually have it in my photobucket account like I thought I did. So I guess instead you will just have to deal with BATMAN PIRATE FIGHTING A SHARK. It doesn't actually fit in with the theme of this entry, but it is the most awesome thing ever, which I feel makes up for a lot.

A SHARK IS NO MATCH FOR RUFFLY-SHIRTED BRUCE WAYNE )

This also reminds me of another subject I was considering, namely: who in bandom, if anybody, do you think Cass Cain would get along with? Sigh, she was my favorite.

Edited to add: Dear The Cab, +10000 points for your adorable video today, but -500 for insulting the awesomeness of Galaxy Quest. Love, me.
schmerica: (hi frankie hi hi hi)
Today I got a really great haircut, you guys. YES IT IS TRUE, I HAVE MANAGED TO OUT-CUTE EVEN MYSELF. I know, right?

The hair place we just started going to is kind of tiny and funky and cute, and our stylist is chatty and pretty with the kind of piercing/tattoos/dyed hair that look really good without actually scaring off the middle-aged people. Yeah, so, now I want a MCR AU where Frank owns a hair salon. FEED ME, FANDOM. FEED ME.

Here, let's play a game. If you can name my top 5 pairings in bandom right now, I will award you the PRIZE OF YOUR CHOICE. (I'm assuming you'll choose a ficlet, but what the hell, if there's something else you think I could manage.) If you comment with some but not all five, I'll tell you how many you got right, but not which ones. It's like the stupid game with colored beads you play in grade school!

Edited to add: Ahaha, you guys all did WAY better at this than I would have with any of you. I am super impressed! Apparently I am kind of loud about what I like? My top 5 at the moment (in no particular order) are: Pete/Mikey, Pete/Joe, Frank/Bob, Gerard/Brian and Gerard/Mikey.

(YES I STILL LOVE GERARD/RAY, AND IF I HAD DONE MY TOP SIX IT TOTALLY WOULD HAVE BEEN INCLDED. Heh.)
schmerica: (gerard's always been my older brother)
So I just spent a ridiculous amount of time playing with the LJ Haiku Generator. Most of the stuff is nonsense, of course, but the stuff that sneaks through is gold.

Like this:

but mikey likes it
because it's like the zen
sound of mikey's voice


Ahahaha. Oh Mikeyway!

And this one is an ENTIRE AU FIC PLOT -- COMPLETE WITH H/C, DUBCON AND POSSIBLY THREESOMES AND INCEST -- in 12 words:

gerard was waiting
for their masters to come with
mikey -- ray wasn't


I added the punctuation to make it easier to read, but otherwise I didn't change that at all. SOMEONE WRITE THIS NOW PLEASE. *waits*

Anyway, I eventually had to stop playing with the generator, because I realized I had, in fact, gotten the Greatest Possible Haiku In All of The Universe, and once that happened there was really no point in going on. I mean, honestly. What on earth could possibly top this?

i am thinking
too hard about pete wentz pete
wentz from fall out boy
schmerica: (frank needs a hug)
You know, I know there are people who really really despise Bob/Frank as a pairing, I do! It's just that for some reason, it's not something that I can keep in my memory for more than a few days at a time? So every single time the idea suddenly becomes really obvious, I am shocked as if it is the first time. IT'S BOB AND FRANK. HOW CAN YOU NOT LOVE BOB/FRANK? *FLAILYHANDS OF DOOM*

(The weird thing I am usually the type of person who is really easygoing about pairing hate. I mean, even when it's a pairing I like myself, I understand how it can be irritating or gross or whatever. I totally have things that make irrational antipathy arise in me, too! It's just this one pairing that flips the switch in my mind that makes me react like you just killed a puppy. Which is especially hilarious when I'm doing it while reading communities that only exist to, you know, be snarky and controversial. Uh, I'm a dork.)

If there was an All About Eve bandom AU, I think Gerard would have to be Margo Channing (GOD, Gerard as Bette Davis, it's so beautiful!) but who would be Eve Harrington? For some reason I'm leaning towards Ryan Ross, but I'm not sure.
schmerica: (gerard's always been my older brother)
I was whining on AIM earlier about how I wanted to write something, but I didn't know what, and Dira told me I should write something that's not Waycest.

I was like "I can totally do that!"

And so I ended up writing 1600 words of completely gratuitous high school AU. \o/

(Lesson learned while writing this: my spellcheck is unfamiliar with the words "iPod", "hoodie", "Wentz" and "jizz." Which is to say, it's completely useless for bandom writing.)

Deep in the Belly of a Whale
by Pearl-o

Pete/Mikey, Gerard/Lyn-Z. 1600 words. High school AU, woooooo!

"Your brother got detention?" Pete said. "What did he do? Did he help that crazy art chick set the fire? Because that was pretty bad-ass."

For [livejournal.com profile] dsudis, because it's not incest.

Deep In the Belly of a Whale )
schmerica: (p. wentz was here)
Last night I had a dream about a giant AU where all the dudes in bandom were, like, sex robot concubines? So they're all just sitting around getting, like, programmed and trained and waiting for their masters to come and get them, but then two of the sexbotutes FALL IN LOVE and it is all ANGSTY AND FORBIDDEN AND ~~~WRONG~~~~.

I don't even know, you guys. Seriously, what? WHAT?

(In the dream the two dudes who fell in love were totally Pete and Mikey though. At least SOME things stay predictable in my crazy brain?)
schmerica: (alternate universes are awesome)
I officially declare that in all college AUs ever, Gerard should totally fill the role of Pretentious Liberal Arts Student of Morally Superior Bisexuality. You guuuuuuuys, he would be so good at it! Everybody's naturally bisexual, just some people won't admit it to themselves! It's not that there's anything wrong with monosexuality, he's not judging or anything, it's just that personally Gerard doesn't understand why anyone would want to restrict their options that way! He falls in love with people, not genders, you know, so it's purer! He talks to his friends on the edges of the Kinsey scale with genuine curiosity!

Pete, on the other hand, self-identified as pansexual for a while, but has moved on to defining his sexuality merely in terms of "slut."
schmerica: (everything awesome is cancelled)
I have reached that stage of sickness where the floor next to my bed is covered with scrunched up snotty tissues. I'M HOT STUFF, ALL RIGHT.

Bandom recasts on my friends list are making me happy. [livejournal.com profile] beingothrwrldly is doing Homestar Runner in her comments, which yay. And [livejournal.com profile] quettaser's post on Arrested Development is a couple days old now, but it still makes me shake with laughter every single time I think about it. Pete/Patrick twincest! Brendon is Annyong! Joe Troh as Buster to GERARD WAY'S LUCILLE BLUTH.

GERARD: You’ve ruined us.
BRIAN: I’ve ruined us? You got a lot of nerve, honey. The millions you pissed away on clothing and jewelry and the spa treatments...
GERARD: Yes, to keep you interested in the only thing you ever appreciated—my body.
BRIAN: Can I help it if you got a fantastic body?
GERARD: And you’re as powerful as a bear. My husband, the bear.
BRIAN: Spare me some honey, wife.
GERARD: Oh, I’ve missed you.


Can you really say your life was complete without that? I doubt it.

I was actually really pleasantly surprised by how many people were willing to read Gerard/Ray, considering it's not a big pairing. You cannot resist the OTP OF NO IRONY WHATSOEVER IN THEIR SOULS, YAY. Of course, now that I have posted that fic, I want nothing else but for people to write me tons of horribly schmoopy domestic sequels to it. This is why I need minions, clearly!

December 2015

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