Well, yeah, it's sort of weird, I guess. But that's the way it's always been, so I think it would be weird to have it any other way, now. When I was growing up, all of my friends had moms and dads, and all the people in the books I read did, too, mostly. WHen I started to grow up, Dad used to get worried about it once in a while, and he'd get me these books and try and find support organizations or pen pals for me, and all this stuff. But ... I don't know. There have always been lots of things that are weird about my family. I had a wolf for a babysitter; my father's in the RCMP; we live in the middle of the nowhere; my father's an American. All of it's just the way my family is, weird or not.
My question is for Fraser from "You and I Are___": Fraser, do you really think that a long-distance relationship is all you and Ray can have? Because it sounds a little like maybe you're just too scared to ask for what you want.
That's certainly a very personal question. It's -- I'm not used to discussing these sorts of things, so I hope you'll excuse me if this does not come out quite right.
I am ... I am deeply in love with Ray Kowalski. I have reason to believe he harbors similar feelings.
But love is a completely irrational beast; it has no respect for people's lives, their feelings, their wants, their needs. It forces its way, regardless of the damage it causes.
Ray is, I believe, a romantic. He still believes that love is something gay and free and charming, despite his own experiences.
Perhaps I am afraid, at that. I am afraid of losing myself in what we have. I am afraid of losing Ray through trying for more -- from nobody's fault, from our daily learning to resent and ignore each other. I am afraid of love; I am more afraid of that love leaving.
There are many things I could wish for us -- but, well, if wishes were horses, beggars would ride.
(Okay, before I do this, I need to ask -- have you read the unofficial follow up stuff? There was this (http://www.livejournal.com/users/dsudis/213848.html) from Dira, and then this (http://www.livejournal.com/users/pearl_o/517361.html) from me.)
Oh, cruddit, I had read those when they first posted but somehow managed to forget them when I reread CDD.
Uh, can I have a do-over question? *g*
For the Fraser of Shake Trip and Fall: what do you see in the future for your relationship with RayK? Or if it's easier, what were you thinking as you drove home that night?
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My question is for Fraser from "You and I Are___": Fraser, do you really think that a long-distance relationship is all you and Ray can have? Because it sounds a little like maybe you're just too scared to ask for what you want.
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I am ... I am deeply in love with Ray Kowalski. I have reason to believe he harbors similar feelings.
But love is a completely irrational beast; it has no respect for people's lives, their feelings, their wants, their needs. It forces its way, regardless of the damage it causes.
Ray is, I believe, a romantic. He still believes that love is something gay and free and charming, despite his own experiences.
Perhaps I am afraid, at that. I am afraid of losing myself in what we have. I am afraid of losing Ray through trying for more -- from nobody's fault, from our daily learning to resent and ignore each other. I am afraid of love; I am more afraid of that love leaving.
There are many things I could wish for us -- but, well, if wishes were horses, beggars would ride.
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[And to
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What did you do when you left the Vecchio's?
Or maybe the question I'm really asking here is, are you gonna get your shit and your really good apology together and go back to Canada?
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Uh, can I have a do-over question? *g*
For the Fraser of Shake Trip and Fall: what do you see in the future for your relationship with RayK? Or if it's easier, what were you thinking as you drove home that night?