reindeer porn!!!

[schmerica]

So Fox and I were talking this afternoon. As we are wont to do.

And Fox was watching Rudolph. Again. As she is wont to do.

And then, uh. Stuff happened.

fox1013: Oh, Clarice. Slave to the patriarchy.
fox1013: *pets*

pearl_o: But she's pretty.

fox1013: For a reindeer. Yes.

pearl_o: Isn't that what's important in a girl?
pearl_o: ...I know she's a reindeer, loser.
pearl_o: It wasn't like I just said "dude, that Clarice is fucking hot" or something.

fox1013: Yeah, but you were about to!

pearl_o: *eyes you*

fox1013: *reads MINDS*

pearl_o: BADLY.

fox1013: ...Maybe.

pearl_o: She's a little too saccharine for my taste.
pearl_o: Along with, you know, being a REINDEER.
pearl_o: Made out of CLAY.

fox1013: *giggles*
fox1013: ...My friends here want me to write Aslan/Simba, okay?
fox1013: THIS IS MY LFE

pearl_o: *giggles*
pearl_o: I always picture Simba as Baby!Simba, so that's extra disturbing.

fox1013: SO DO I
fox1013: And, um, Aslan?
fox1013: JESUS.

pearl_o: *nods*
pearl_o: And not baby Jesus. Big scary Christ figure.

fox1013: Indeed.
fox1013: With a mane.

pearl_o: Yet? Still not a REINDEER made of CLAY.

fox1013: ...You are very discriminating, clearly.

pearl_o: Yeah, I'm kind of miffed.

fox1013: *adores*

pearl_o: "For a reindeer." BAH.

fox1013: *giggles*

pearl_o: *adores back*

fox1013: I just can't tell how she's cute.
fox1013: Like, she has a bow.

pearl_o: She has big eyelashes.

fox1013: Is that all it takes in reindeer society?
fox1013: A bow and big eyelashes?

pearl_o: Yes.
pearl_o: And sappy songs.

fox1013: Dude. If I were a reindeer?
fox1013: I would be the belle of the fuckng ball.

pearl_o: You SO WOULD.
pearl_o: You would be, like, the Reindeer Slut
pearl_o: I think that should be the name of your first album.

fox1013: *giggles*
fox1013: I would be the Grand Master Doe.

pearl_o: *giggles*
pearl_o: you would have the bucks LINING UP.
pearl_o: just to get your sweet reindeer love.
pearl_o: ...are we starting to disturb you yet?

fox1013: I just started snifflng, but I thnk that may be allergies.

pearl_o: This conversation seems to say something really important about the two of us
pearl_o: but I really couldn't tell you what that thing is.
fox1013: No, although I bet it'd be fascinating if we knew what it was.

pearl_o: *giggles some more*
pearl_o: If we posted this, I bet most of the peanut gallery votes would be for "crack".

fox1013: *considers*
fox1013: You should post the convo. ANd then a poll.

pearl_o: Okay!
fox1013: Although I am afraid of the answers.

[Poll #378146]