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schmerica1. My enjoyment of a romance is directly related to how much I like the protaganists.
1a. I really appreciate nice characters. Dare I say 'likable'?
1b. Dark, brooding, angsty and/or cruel alpha heroes are omg teh boring. Exceptions are made if I like the author enough (would I be reading Shadowheart, based on its description, if it were anyone but Kinsale? No.)
2. Sex scenes are almost always boring.*
3. The only contemporaries I've ever gotten more than a chapter into have been Jennifer Crusie.
4. Wit and humor = happy me.
5. As with soap operas, often the most enjoyment comes from the books that sound most ridiculous when described out loud.
6. Exotic locales get you bonus points. As does geekiness.
*Actually, the least boring romance novel sex scene I have read in quite a while was in the novel I was reading yesterday. La la la kissing la la la foreplay la la la passion and need and etc, the hero is stroking and caressing the heroine, she's climaxing, and oh, the hero can't take it anymore, he can't restrain himself, he's poised to enter -- and then the heroine reaches down and touches his penis, and he shoots his wad all over her belly. Heh. This also had the heroine aged 31 (to the hero's 29), which I also appreciated. Also, when they *do* have intercourse, she is that rarest of breeds, omg, a virgin who didn't bleed.
Two links that don't really have much to do with this at all:
The Bad Sex in Fiction award nominees, which I promised spes a link to
and Resonant's How to Write a Sex Scene lessons, which I think everyone who plans on writing smutty fanfiction should be reading, because she's brilliant.
1a. I really appreciate nice characters. Dare I say 'likable'?
1b. Dark, brooding, angsty and/or cruel alpha heroes are omg teh boring. Exceptions are made if I like the author enough (would I be reading Shadowheart, based on its description, if it were anyone but Kinsale? No.)
2. Sex scenes are almost always boring.*
3. The only contemporaries I've ever gotten more than a chapter into have been Jennifer Crusie.
4. Wit and humor = happy me.
5. As with soap operas, often the most enjoyment comes from the books that sound most ridiculous when described out loud.
6. Exotic locales get you bonus points. As does geekiness.
*Actually, the least boring romance novel sex scene I have read in quite a while was in the novel I was reading yesterday. La la la kissing la la la foreplay la la la passion and need and etc, the hero is stroking and caressing the heroine, she's climaxing, and oh, the hero can't take it anymore, he can't restrain himself, he's poised to enter -- and then the heroine reaches down and touches his penis, and he shoots his wad all over her belly. Heh. This also had the heroine aged 31 (to the hero's 29), which I also appreciated. Also, when they *do* have intercourse, she is that rarest of breeds, omg, a virgin who didn't bleed.
Two links that don't really have much to do with this at all:
The Bad Sex in Fiction award nominees, which I promised spes a link to
and Resonant's How to Write a Sex Scene lessons, which I think everyone who plans on writing smutty fanfiction should be reading, because she's brilliant.
