ds snippet

[schmerica]

I've been poking this around, but it's really not going to grow up into a story. So, livejournal it is!

(Thank you to darling lynnmonster for looking it over.)

*****

Fraser's lips moved from my mouth towards the side of my neck, kissing and sucking there. I tried thrusting up against him, but Fraser's weight was pinning me down, heavy, more than I expected somehow. I ran my hand across his back (it was getting sweaty now, all slick and bare) and said, "Yeah, like that--"

"Don't talk," Fraser whispered, and I opened my eyes. Fraser was looking at me, but his eyes were weird, like he was scared or desparate or -- *something*, anyway. Intense. I didn't know what to do with any of that, so I just closed my eyes again and nodded and after a second Fraser was kissing me again.

It wasn't like I'd imagined going to bed with Fraser would be. It'd been in my head for a long time, not just going to bed but all kinds of stuff, stuff with me and him, just thinking, because God knew it wasn't going to happen.

I'd thought about it, but not like this, not with Fraser in charge and me silent, moving together in the dark like -- Jesus, it was like Stella and me the last couple times before she threw me out, like when we were falling apart, but this was me and Fraser and this was supposed to be the *beginning*, wasn't it? We'd been coming up to my place, and Fraser'd said something funny in that fake-sincere way he has, and I turned around and looked at him there in the hallway to my apartment with that geeky smile on his face and something clicked and I kissed him, and for reasons that escaped me, Fraser kissed me back. Just as eager, even, hands everywhere, pulling me in with him and just *wanting* it.

That smile was definitely long gone now, though.

Fraser was licking around my ear now, still thrusting down with this steady rhythm, and I couldn't help it, I started to say, "Fraser--"

And Fraser groaned and stilled his hips and said "*Please*," in this voice I hadn't ever heard from him before.

So I swallowed and shut up and just held him a lot closer and tighter and tried to make him feel good, trying to talk to him like that.

Comments

[brooklinegirl.livejournal.com]

*whimpers*

You keep hurting me with your fic, but I still love and adore it and you, and wow, this is just so very Fraser, wanting what he can't have, but when it turns out he can have it, it still hurts and - yeah.

*whimpersmore*

But - wonderful:

So I swallowed and shut up and just held him a lot closer and tighter and tried to make him feel good, trying to talk to him like that.

[pearl-o.livejournal.com]

I was reading somebody's journal on my friends list the other day, and they were talking about how one of the reasons they couldn't really get into ds fandom, though they liked the show, was because they thought the fic showed him as much more damaged than they saw him.

And I went "huh" and squinted at Fraser sideways and tried to see him in a way that *wasn't* kinda issue-laden and fucked-up and failed.

Anyway.

*snugs blg*

The flashfiction was nice! It wasn't ouchladen! I think.