i confuse myself

[schmerica]

So when I was in Smallville fandom, shipping Clark and Lex, there was always, always the background thought of "they are doomed. Doomed, doomed, doomed." Knowing this didn't keep me from reading or writing or enjoying hopeful or happy fic, but the knowledge was always there, still.

It occurs to me that I feel precisely the opposite in the case of due South fiction, with much less justification. Which is to say, basically, that I can read and love all the unhappy or badly-ending or depressing F/K in the world, but at the end, the back of my head still thinks "But really, they lived Happily Ever After."

Which, really, is all the fault of Call of the Wild. I mean, I adore them madly and think them slashy for the rest of their episodes together, but it's the finale that really cements my view of everything. And I've talked about my thoughts on CotW in rather long blithering length elsewhere, but it kind of just comes down to two things:

a) At some point, Benton Fraser has become the single most important thing in Ray Kowalski's life

and b) Benton Fraser deserves and gets his Happy Ending. Peace, family, justice, home.

So, I can read the really depressing F/K post-CotW stories, and they'll break me and kill my soul, but it doesn't stick, somehow, because for whatever reason I can't view this episode and not believe somehow they manage to live Happily Ever After. Whatever that means, I suppose -- and there's a large range of variation there, I think.

[None of this has anything to do with my weird post-Perfect-Strangers-viewing-and-talking-to-Livia desire to read Fraser/RayK kidfic. *shame*]

Comments

[theodosia.livejournal.com]

Hell, I know in my heart that they don't ever even die, exactly, just get bodily assumed into heaven. (Also Dief.)

[pearl-o.livejournal.com]

You know, if somebody has asked me earlier if I would expect to have Fraser, Dief and RayK all compared to the Virgin Mary in my journal comments, I probably would have guessed 'no'.