it doesn't have a title yet

[schmerica]

YOU GUYS blondiusmaximus WAS HAVING A BAD DAY.

IF YOU KNOW BLAYNE YOU KNOW WHY THIS WAS COMPLETELY UNACCEPTABLE.

SO I WROTE HER A STOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORY!

:DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD

IT IS A STORY FILLED WITH EVERY SINGLE ONE OF HER FAVORITE THINGS I COULD CRAM INTO 180 WORDS. ILU BLAYNE! ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥

A STORY FOR BLAYNE
BY PEARL AGED 23 1/2

ONCE THERE WAS A BOY NAMED FRANKIE. HE WAS A VERY PRETTY BOY. SO PRETTY WAS FRANKIE! HE DRESSED IN PINK AND WORE BARRETTES IN HIS HAIR AND LAUGHED AN INNOCENT LAUGH. ONE DAY AFTER SCHOOL HE MET A BOY NAMED GERARD. GERARD WAS ~~~OLDER AND MYSTERIOUS AND DARK AND HANDSOME BUT HE STILL LIKED FRANKIE ANYWAY! THEY BECAME FAST FRIENDS AND WALKED AROUND HOLDING HANDS AND GERARD BOUGHT FRANKIE ALL SORTS OF PRETTY PINK BARRETTES.

THEN ONE DAY GERARD RAPED FRANKIE. HE PUT HIS PENIS IN FRANKIE'S ROSEBUD. IT HURT A LOT. MORE THAN ANYTHING ELSE IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD. FRANKIE CRIED. HE CRIED A LOT. GERARD SAID "FRANKIE YOU'RE A WHORE" AND SPIT ON HIM AND TOOK ONE OF HIS PRETTY BARRETTES.

AT HOME GERARD'S BROTHER MIKEY WAS WAITING AND GERARD GAVE HIM THE BARRETTE AND THEY ARRANGED IT ON THEIR ALTER THEY HAD MADE OF ALL OF GERARD'S RAPE VICTIMS. THEN THEY HAD GROSS INCESTY SEX WITH WATERSPORTS

MEANWHILE FRANKIE KILLED HIMSELF. A BEAUTIFUL ROSE BUSH GREW ON TOP OF HIS GRAVE AND BLOOMED PURE PINK ROSES EVERY YEAR.

THE END

Comments

[strobelighted.livejournal.com]

hey wait. this isn't how it's supposed to work. >:(

well fine. if Gerard's penis were sentient, it would be on the internet claiming that Steve is not really that impressive and also Ray stuffs dontcha know. Gerard clearly has the biggest penis in the band.

[pearl-o.livejournal.com]

I like how Gerard's sentient penis sounds a lot like fanon Frank

[strobelighted.livejournal.com]

You know, this puts a whole different spin on Frank/Gerard. Gerard is really in love with his penis.

[pearl-o.livejournal.com]

It makes the Frank/Mikey bff thing a little questionable, though.

[strobelighted.livejournal.com]

but it totally justifies the Gerard/Mikey pairing. you know, I wonder what Gerard would do if Mikey referred to his penis as Frank.

[pearl-o.livejournal.com]

...I'd read it.

[strobelighted.livejournal.com]

you need to stop doing that. >:(