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5/6/08 00:34![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
schmericaYOU GUYS ![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
blondiusmaximus WAS HAVING A BAD DAY.
IF YOU KNOW BLAYNE YOU KNOW WHY THIS WAS COMPLETELY UNACCEPTABLE.
SO I WROTE HER A STOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORY!
:DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD
IT IS A STORY FILLED WITH EVERY SINGLE ONE OF HER FAVORITE THINGS I COULD CRAM INTO 180 WORDS. ILU BLAYNE! ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥
A STORY FOR BLAYNE
BY PEARL AGED 23 1/2
ONCE THERE WAS A BOY NAMED FRANKIE. HE WAS A VERY PRETTY BOY. SO PRETTY WAS FRANKIE! HE DRESSED IN PINK AND WORE BARRETTES IN HIS HAIR AND LAUGHED AN INNOCENT LAUGH. ONE DAY AFTER SCHOOL HE MET A BOY NAMED GERARD. GERARD WAS ~~~OLDER AND MYSTERIOUS AND DARK AND HANDSOME BUT HE STILL LIKED FRANKIE ANYWAY! THEY BECAME FAST FRIENDS AND WALKED AROUND HOLDING HANDS AND GERARD BOUGHT FRANKIE ALL SORTS OF PRETTY PINK BARRETTES.
THEN ONE DAY GERARD RAPED FRANKIE. HE PUT HIS PENIS IN FRANKIE'S ROSEBUD. IT HURT A LOT. MORE THAN ANYTHING ELSE IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD. FRANKIE CRIED. HE CRIED A LOT. GERARD SAID "FRANKIE YOU'RE A WHORE" AND SPIT ON HIM AND TOOK ONE OF HIS PRETTY BARRETTES.
AT HOME GERARD'S BROTHER MIKEY WAS WAITING AND GERARD GAVE HIM THE BARRETTE AND THEY ARRANGED IT ON THEIR ALTER THEY HAD MADE OF ALL OF GERARD'S RAPE VICTIMS. THEN THEY HAD GROSS INCESTY SEX WITH WATERSPORTS
MEANWHILE FRANKIE KILLED HIMSELF. A BEAUTIFUL ROSE BUSH GREW ON TOP OF HIS GRAVE AND BLOOMED PURE PINK ROSES EVERY YEAR.
THE END
blondiusmaximus WAS HAVING A BAD DAY.IF YOU KNOW BLAYNE YOU KNOW WHY THIS WAS COMPLETELY UNACCEPTABLE.
SO I WROTE HER A STOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORY!
:DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD
IT IS A STORY FILLED WITH EVERY SINGLE ONE OF HER FAVORITE THINGS I COULD CRAM INTO 180 WORDS. ILU BLAYNE! ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥
A STORY FOR BLAYNE
BY PEARL AGED 23 1/2
ONCE THERE WAS A BOY NAMED FRANKIE. HE WAS A VERY PRETTY BOY. SO PRETTY WAS FRANKIE! HE DRESSED IN PINK AND WORE BARRETTES IN HIS HAIR AND LAUGHED AN INNOCENT LAUGH. ONE DAY AFTER SCHOOL HE MET A BOY NAMED GERARD. GERARD WAS ~~~OLDER AND MYSTERIOUS AND DARK AND HANDSOME BUT HE STILL LIKED FRANKIE ANYWAY! THEY BECAME FAST FRIENDS AND WALKED AROUND HOLDING HANDS AND GERARD BOUGHT FRANKIE ALL SORTS OF PRETTY PINK BARRETTES.
THEN ONE DAY GERARD RAPED FRANKIE. HE PUT HIS PENIS IN FRANKIE'S ROSEBUD. IT HURT A LOT. MORE THAN ANYTHING ELSE IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD. FRANKIE CRIED. HE CRIED A LOT. GERARD SAID "FRANKIE YOU'RE A WHORE" AND SPIT ON HIM AND TOOK ONE OF HIS PRETTY BARRETTES.
AT HOME GERARD'S BROTHER MIKEY WAS WAITING AND GERARD GAVE HIM THE BARRETTE AND THEY ARRANGED IT ON THEIR ALTER THEY HAD MADE OF ALL OF GERARD'S RAPE VICTIMS. THEN THEY HAD GROSS INCESTY SEX WITH WATERSPORTS
MEANWHILE FRANKIE KILLED HIMSELF. A BEAUTIFUL ROSE BUSH GREW ON TOP OF HIS GRAVE AND BLOOMED PURE PINK ROSES EVERY YEAR.
THE END
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![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
(no subject)
5/6/08 07:40 (UTC)'BEAUTIFUL'
YOU KNOW, LIKE FRANKIE'S ROSEBUD~~
IT WAS THE COLOR OF HIS BEAUTIFUL PINK DRESS~~ WHICH WAS STAINED WITH BLOOD FROM HIS WRISTS~~ MUCH AS HIS BEAUTIFUL ROSEBUD WAS BLOODIED BY GERARD'S HUGE ANGRY PENIS~~~~~
ANGRY PENIS!!!
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5/6/08 07:42 (UTC)(no subject)
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5/6/08 07:46 (UTC)(no subject)
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5/6/08 23:15 (UTC)(no subject)
5/6/08 07:48 (UTC)THAT WAS Just beautiful
YOU ARE MY FAVORITE
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5/6/08 09:43 (UTC)(no subject)
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5/6/08 23:16 (UTC)(no subject)
5/6/08 11:23 (UTC)I've been sitting here for 5 minutes trying to say something in response to this. The only coherant statement I find myself capable of is HI, PEARL, I WOULD LIKE TO GIVE YOU HUGS.
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5/6/08 16:29 (UTC)(no subject)
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5/6/08 18:53 (UTC)oh hilarious pearl
you slay me
my admiration for this epic crackficlet, told in haiku! gross incesty sex with watersports! <3
(no subject)
5/6/08 23:20 (UTC)(no subject)
5/6/08 19:39 (UTC)YOU ARE MY NEW FAAAAVORITE.
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5/6/08 23:20 (UTC)(no subject)
5/6/08 21:06 (UTC)THE COMMENTS ARE EVEN BETTER THAN THE FIC ITSELF. *cradles them*
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5/6/08 23:20 (UTC)(no subject)
5/6/08 22:20 (UTC)Mommybrought it back.<3
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6/6/08 05:47 (UTC)(no subject)
6/6/08 06:20 (UTC)