i wasn't expecting to make this post today, but okay!

[schmerica]

So, hey: I am a member of bandflesh. I've never tried particularly hard to hide this, and I've had it confirmed on multiple occasions that anybody who comes in to read the comm for the first time has been able to identify me almost immediately. I am not subtle, I am not a ninja, and I am not ashamed of my involvement there.

I understand why people have problems with the comm, and I respect their positions, even though I don't agree with them. I've inadvertantly hurt one of my good friends there at least once, to be honest, and knowing I did so made me cry and consider leaving the comm for good. In the end, we sorted that out and reached a place where I have both that friend and the joy I get from bandflesh.

That only works if the person trusts me, though. I can say that I don't "hide behind anonymity" as an excuse to talk shit about people, but why should you believe me? If you trust me, I'm glad. If you don't, then it makes sense you'd defriend me over this. I think that's less an issue about bandflesh than it is about our relationship, and it makes me sad, but it's totally your prerogative, you know?

Like I said in the first paragraph, I am not a subtle person in any way. I have a fuckload of flaws, but I really don't think two-facedness is one of them. If I love you, I hope you know it and believe it.

Comments

[fox1013.livejournal.com]

I think you're a ninja.

[pearl-o.livejournal.com]

NO U.

[blondiusmaximus.livejournal.com]

I BELIEVE YOU AND I LOVE YOU TOO, OKAY.

[pearl-o.livejournal.com]

BLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYNE NEVER LEAVE ME OKAY

[queenofhell.livejournal.com]

You might want to change that to "I can say I don't hide behind anon to talk shit about people."

And yep, you are totes the first person I realized was on bandflesh, and had a lot to do with me going "okay, maybe it's not the pit of satan's minions that I've heard it is." So thank you for that. *hugs*

[pearl-o.livejournal.com]

Ahahaha, thank you for that typo correction! That definitely makes a difference in what I'm trying to say.

[lovesongwriter.livejournal.com]

PEARL, DID I EVER TELL YOU YOU'RE PRECIOUS?

Cause you are <3

[pearl-o.livejournal.com]

If you did, I don't remember? :D

[offtheceiling.livejournal.com]

I THINK YOU ARE RATHER AWESOME. AND COULD TOTALLY ROCK A NINJA ATTACK.

[pearl-o.livejournal.com]

I APPRECIATE YOUR BELIEF IN ME

[elucidate-this.livejournal.com]

heeeee you were definitely the first person i made when i was lurking last night (i'd never been there). icu pearl asking for ray/gerard cuddling.

[pearl-o.livejournal.com]

It's not always me! I swear!

[just-katarin.livejournal.com]

YOU'RE TOTES A NINJA, BB. MOAST NINJA

[pearl-o.livejournal.com]

ALMOST AS NINJA AS YOU, AMIRITE?

[cool-rain-kiss.livejournal.com]

Falsfax! You are made of stealth! ♥

[pearl-o.livejournal.com]

Stealth and baby kittens!

[inkdot.livejournal.com]

I keep forgetting that people have a problem with anonmemes because everyone I know is regularly on anonmemes. :D:

In other news, ♥! I HAD NO IDEA.

[pearl-o.livejournal.com]

When I first found bandflesh and they were like "blah blah blah meme" I was like "MEME? REALLY? BUT THAT'S WHERE ROZES AND JULES AND INKDOTS LIVE! Obviously bandflesh must be awesome."

[happy-coconut.livejournal.com]

You're a ninja! Just...a really crappy one, that all the other ninjas make fun of. The ninja master wants to take away your ninja-ing rights, but when the news gets out, there is this HUGE PROTEST because even the ninjas that had been making fun of you LOVE you and know how AWESOME and HILARIOUS you are!

&YOU;

[pearl-o.livejournal.com]

You are the best sister ever.

[greyandgrey.livejournal.com]

The hard lines people are taking over this bandflesh thing make me kind of irritated. I'm not a member, I only heard of it today. People I like are members there, people I like have apparently been talked smack about there. The anon aspect to the community admittedly makes me a little itchy, but whatever. I'm gonna put that aside for now.

The community did not set out to hurt anyone. I understand that. People were hurt nonetheless, and there are members of bandflesh who are irrationally defending those hurtful actions.

People were hurt, and I understand that, too. But defriending every single member of the community, including close friends, because they *might* have said mean things about you or someone you know is also irrational.

All this is to say that I'm really relieved to see you representing a middle ground, admitting that mistakes can be made but can also be repaired.

[speshope.livejournal.com]

Being so oblivious to subtlety myself, your unsubtlety (makin' up a word! \o/) is one of my favorite qualities!


Though honestly, I suspect it would take me embarrassingly long to identify anyone-- no matter how long I've known them-- without their usernames attached because of aforementioned oblivious- and denseness. So you'll all always be ninja-like to me!

[happy-coconut.livejournal.com]

trust me, you'd know.

[girlneedsagun.livejournal.com]

I think you are awesome, just so you know :)

[pearl-o.livejournal.com]

:D

[riadsala.livejournal.com]

People go on about how ninja you are, but I trufax can't file you nearly as much as everyone else. And a lot of the time I file you based on everyone going "lol moast stealthy" etc. I guess I just am the most lolblivious mouse. :D

[pearl-o.livejournal.com]

That makes me happy! I am actually really bad at filing people, too, unless it's someone I talk to on AIM a lot.

[strobelighted.livejournal.com]

TOTALLY ONTOPIC: how's that conmen AU coming along?

[pearl-o.livejournal.com]

You think I have had time to write after sleeping all day and then catching up on this?

[mythofthebelle.livejournal.com]

If it is any consolation, I am a horrible filemouse and can only file you once there's a whole thread talking about how un-ninja you are, and even then I only have a 50/50 chance of being right. /o\

[pearl-o.livejournal.com]

\o/

[lovesongwriter.livejournal.com]

btw I can always file you cause ilu that much, not that you're not a total ninja <3

[pearl-o.livejournal.com]

*beams* It's just your ~lurking skills

[jezrana.livejournal.com]

...Yeah, when I was first lurking, I think I saw Ray/Gerard and Waycest mentioned in the same comment, or something, and just went "...huh. Hi, Pearl!"

And like I said in my own journal: I have paranoia and trust issues, but I had them before I ever set foot on the internet, and I try to work on them on my own and not let them affect my internet (or RL) friendships.

[pearl-o.livejournal.com]

I totally understand that, and I think people should do whatever they need to to make them comfortable, so.

[fluffontop.livejournal.com]

I'm not on bandflesh, but I have been linked there, and I once saw someone on there talking about about my story and it was one of the best constructive criticisms I have seen. So that, to me, is pretty nifty. People talking openly and honestly.

I actually don't get the outcry - that community, from what I can tell, has not been the cause of or the centre of every drama or kerfuffle in bandom lately, so I have no problem with it. With regards to the anonymous thing, I've certainly seen horribly "open" bitchy posts on lj with names attached all fine and dandy, but just cryptic enough that the people being bitched about can't really defend themselves - so anonymity is not the default worst way you can make bitchy posts in public, is what I'm saying.

I don't know, it tends to rub me the wrong way when people post about how other people and their secret communities are so horrible and hateful and totally to blame for their now terribly sad fandom experience. You see it all over fandom. It just seems like the onus is misplaced. Shouldn't you have to take responsibility for your own fandom experience and not do things that land you on fandom wank, etc?

Anyway. Wow, this got all rambly. Basically what I'm saying is, hey, bandflesh, I go there for pictures sometimes so please post many and please stop saying there is no Pete/Mikey subtext.

[pearl-o.livejournal.com]

I really appreciate you making this comment, dude, and not least because now whenever I go over there all NEEDS MOAR PETE/MIKEY I can add, with complete truth, that the lurkers support me in real lj. ♥