paulie bleeker, ilu

[schmerica]

Today I went with my sister to see Juno and it was MADE OF AWESOME. Seriously, like, infinite hearts. I loved it. Ellen Page and Michael Cera own my soul. Yes. I need the mp3 of them singing together like burning.

Then I came back and read more of the anonymeme replies from the five hours I was out, and the fatphobia had gotten so much worse, you guys. D: D: D: D: STOP THAT FANDOM. STOP THAT NOW.

Of course, that still leaves me like 98% amused to 2% pissed off, so all in all, good show!

(What's really sad is I find myself really, really glad now that all the girls in our canon are tiny. How awful is that? But I just don't think I could take the criticism a non-skinny girl would get. SIGH.)

Frank/Bob! And lots of Bob porn from before he got skinny! THANKS.

I just left a comment to fallingfortruth that basically said, "MY CHEMICAL ROMANCE RENAISSANCE DRAMA AU, Y/N?" Which I will admit I only said to get a chance to suggest the title 'Tis Pity Mikey's a Whore. Come on, even if you hate incest fiction, you have to admit that's hilarious. Hee.

The other day the subject of "Pete travelling through time to have sex with baby!Patrick" came up yet again, when kalpurna said that he'd totally do it even if he already HAD had sex with that Patrick in the normal timeline. Which of course leads to the question of whether Pete Wentz would go back in time to have a threesome with Baby!Patrick and his own younger self.

I THINK WE ALL KNOW THE ANSWER TO THIS, DEEP IN OUR HEARTS.

(Patrick would be all, "wait, so you got even MORE insane in seven years? How does that work?")

You know what is never not funny? The word "cockslut." ♥

In conclusion: but I don't want to want to fuck Brendon Urie. Make it stop? Help me, fandom.

Comments

[blondiusmaximus.livejournal.com]

Of course you want to want to fuck Brendon Urie. I bet he purrs. That, or he will surprise everyone by being the biggest, dirtiest, hardest fuck of any boy in bandom.


or, of course, if you don't want him, that's cool. you know. more for me, etc etc.

[pearl-o.livejournal.com]

*sigh* I do, I really do. Not as much I want to see him get double-teamed by dudes, but. STILL. DAMN YOU BDEN.

[blondiusmaximus.livejournal.com]

double-teamed by dudes because he purrs and is also the biggest, dirtiest, hardest fuck of any boy in bandom, y/n.



He has always been my favorite, even during the dorkfaces. I am slowly warming up to Spencer and Ryan and there's a special place in my heart for Jon (although he looks way too much like this Boy in my life and it creeps me out a little, YOU KNOW), but oh, oh, BRENDON, ilu.

[harriet-vane.livejournal.com]

I need Brendon to stop being a hotass, like, yesterday. It's not good for my soul.

[pearl-o.livejournal.com]

*nods sadly* Luckily we still have all the goofy sweetheart faces immortalized, too.

[harriet-vane.livejournal.com]

I... I think if I saw *this* Brendon cracking up and giggling all goofy-faced, I'd want even MORE to do dirty, dirty things to him. Oh god.

[warmingweather.livejournal.com]

Here (http://www.yousendit.com/transfer.php?action=download&ufid=62C5E47B77B0FF9B) is the mp3 of them singing together (it's mislabeled as "Anyone Else But You"). I downloaded the soundtrack as soon as I got home from seeing the movie, because I am a nutbar.

(Oh, man, the fatphobia on the meme is unbelievable. Fandom is not as feminist/accepting as I wish it was sometimes! Obviously the answer is to write lots and lots of porn about Patrick. WHAT A HARDSHIP.)

[pearl-o.livejournal.com]

OOOOH YAY! Thank you so much for the music!

Patrick/pre-skinny!Bob, I'm telling you. PRACTICALLY CANON.

[warmingweather.livejournal.com]

No problem! The soundtrack was so much fun.

INDEED. I feel like Patrick and Bob are kindred spirits. At the end of the day, exhausted from dealing with Pete or Gerard and Frank, they just crack open a couple of beers, complain for awhile, and then fuck all night. They get sweaty and sticky and disgusting and it doesn't even matter, because it's such hot sex. \o/

[mazily.livejournal.com]

My response to this entry is mostly, "Bob/Frank! Pre-skinny Bob! Pre-skinny Bob/pre-legal Patrick! Bob/Frank! BobBobBobBobBob! Ooh, and Brendon!" on an endless loop.

[pearl-o.livejournal.com]

\o/ X INFINITY

[mimesere.livejournal.com]

oh dear. did it get worse? It was only at six pages of distressing when I went to work and then I didn't read it, 'cause, uh, I talk to dumb people all day and nothing is helped by me being all *grr* at them over people in fandom being dumb and icky.

paaaaaaatrick stump, I want to bite your arms. And write lots of porn where everyone is over at the Fortress of Bachelortude and Gerard is telling Patrick allllll about Warhammer and how it is awesome and showing off his tiny figurines and Patrick is making ??? face at him and so is Bob and Frankie laughs like a crazy person at how they have matching expressions and Ray is in the background with a pad of paper that says, "WoW = WIN" and "For the Horde" and "Oh god, patrick, don't listen to Gerard or else he will not stop talking about this and we will have to put up with it in the studio tomorrow please please for the love of god, pretend pete is calling you" and it gets to really small text by the end and then the next page just has stick figure drawings of a person with a crazy afro being eaten by sharks -- Patrick can tell because the stick figure shark has a fin -- and a diagram of how Warhammer is lame, no, really, LAME and Gerard doesn't even turn around before he says, kind of snippily, "It is not lame and your shark sucks." and then Ray cuddles him in apology.

...and maybe then there is an orgy.

[pearl-o.livejournal.com]

It got way worse! I was sad. There is one comment where somebody is like "sorry, chubby guys just aren't my kink" (emphasis mine). Because it is so WEIRD to be attracted to anybody who isn't STICK THIN that it is a KINK. A KINK. WHAT.

Also, I love your brain so much. SHARKS AND CUDDLES YAY.

[mimesere.livejournal.com]

:((((

I. I don't even understand people. 'Cause okay, I'm not saying I don't find the skinny boys attractive -- god, knows, there are plenty of them who make me go HOW YOU DOIN'? -- but mostly what I look for in...uh, anyone I want to hit it with is, "Does this person look fragile, y/n?" and if the answer is yes, then NO SEXYTIMES. Because you know, apparently, what turns me on is sturdiness. OH BABY. Pete Wentz? Sturdy. Pretty much all of FOB = sturdy. Ray/Bob/Gerard = sturdy (Mikey and Frank are pretty! but oh god, I'm so afraid they'd *break*). And like, I feel about Ryan Ross the way I feel about Keira Knightley which is pretty much, "EAT A CHEESEBURGER FOR THE LOVE OF CHRIST, HOW AREN'T YOU DEAD FROM MALNUTRITIION?" Um.

Anyway. I just. Yeah, I'm like, "Oh Patrick Stump, you have the arms of a 19t century woman, come to me, baby, I will rock your world!" And I love ridiculous emo hair Bob, but I love ridiculous viking Bob even more. This is probably more than you ever needed to know about What I Find Hot In Boys.

And okay, so, Mikey and Ray are all despairing because Gerard is totally seducing the Fortress of Bachelortude into Warhammer instead of Warcrack, I mean Warcraft, so they launch this campaign to hide Gerard's Warhammer stuff and he stalks into the studio one day and gives them this GLARE and is like, "I am holding your guitar hostage, Ray," and Ray is all puzzled because, "I'm holding my guitar, Gerard." "AFTER. I am holding your guitar hostage AFTER recording. Make a note of that, okay?" and he hands Ray a piece of paper that says, "You owe me one [1] guitar until my figures are returned to me." And he glares at Mikey too and says, "I replaced your coffee with decaf."

Meanwhile, Bob is texting Patrick with, "band = crazy ppl" and Patrick texts back with "you are my alibi" (patrick hates looking for punctuation when he texts anyone) and Bob is all, "??" and patrick says, "when I kill pete." and Bob texts back, "ok - chinese tonight?" and patrick texts back, "yes please. i'll blow you in the kitchen." And then Bob is all :D and it kind of creeps everyone out when he's all beamy like that.

[ladysorka]

Jamia is actually a bit bigger - she seems to fluctuate, but I think she actually often hovers around a 10/12. So, normal, but a lot bigger than most of the girls.

I'm actually kind of amazed I don't see more people bashing her for it when I venture out into the, uh, more wild parts of the fandom.

[pearl-o.livejournal.com]

That actually makes me really happy -- thank you for sharing that!

[prettykitty-aya.livejournal.com]

um, i may or may not have that second pic of brendon as my desktop. tiled. twice the hott. ugh, b, knock it off.

fallingfortruth may love you for that, lol, knowing him.

frank/bob = &hearts &hearts &hearts

[pearl-o.livejournal.com]

My desktop is still stuck on that black&white Mikeyway Kerrang shot that just came out a little while ago. MIKEYWAY, you are still my FAVORITE.

SO MUCH LOVE.

[prettykitty-aya.livejournal.com]

SHAAAAAARE. i don't know if i've seen that mikeyway shot, hmmm.

[carleton97.livejournal.com]

pre-skinny Bob porn would rule my LIFE. And if it were Bob/Brian? Even better. Or Patrick. Or Frank. Really, just Bob. (I suck at timeline things. When did Bob get all skinny? I mean, I know he was skinny by the time he got set on fire...)

re: Pete travelling through time...

He'd totally do it for the following reasons:

a) virginity. He wants Patrick's and if he has to go back to 2003 to accomplish that, dammit, he's doing it.

b) the aforementioned threesome with younger self and baby!patrick

c) BECAUSE HE CAN AND HOW AWESOME IS THAT??!?!?!

[pearl-o.livejournal.com]

I don't know the exact timeline, either, actually!

[xanphibian.livejournal.com]

COCKSLUT is totally my favorite word. That and boywhore.

[pearl-o.livejournal.com]

COCKSLUT COCKSLUT COCKSLUT.

[universeunfold.livejournal.com]

I think Brendon Urie is hot like burning. I feel like a total pedophile for saying that, but seriously. His eyes, his MOUTH, his hands, his butt...Damn.

I would read anything that included "Mikey's a whore" in the title.


Also, I completely avoided the unpopular opinion thing, just because I figured people would talk trash on Patrick and Pete and Mikey, and I just couldn't handle that. They're entitled to their opinions, but anytime anyone comments on Patrick's weight, I see red. (This is true in RL too. A guy I work with commented that Patrick was kinda heavy when I showed him my meet and greet pic with the band. It was all I could do not to slug him.)

[pearl-o.livejournal.com]

He's not *that* young! It's not the age thing that bothers me, at least.

I would read anything that included "Mikey's a whore" in the title.

Ahaha, awesome.